i don't speak french

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So, I'm coming up on graduation next semester, and I'm graduating with a minor in French.

The way that I got this minor is... kind of on accident. When I was in eighth grade, my best friend at the time was asking if she could take French for her foreign language. I went to the tiniest school in the world, so it had to be over ITV, but we managed to gather enough people for a French class. I just kind of... kept taking French. Then college came around and I just kind of...

Kept taking French.

My French professor wants me to postpone graduation a semester, go to France next semester, and then graduate with a French major in addition to the English major. When she was talking about it last Thursday, I kind of wanted to do it. And part of me does... see the good part of it? Maybe I want to. But I don't know if I really want to. I don't know if I want to postpone graduation. I don't know if I actually want to.

Also, I don't speak French. I do not speak French. I am bad at it. I can muddle through  light conversation, like, what's the time, hi this is my name, how are you, and I can vaguely read it, but I can't speak French. It's stupid, because I've been taking the damn language for going on eight years, but I can't speak French.

I was talking to my dad last night and he thinks I should go. But people thinking I should do something make me not want to do something.

I don't know. I have French this morning and she'll probably try and convert me again. I don't want to not go because I'm scared, but I don't think that's why I don't want to go. I think I don't want to go because there's so much here that I want to do before I think about fucking off to France for a semester.

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