Serial Killers with Cookies Cover + Chapter One + Release Date


So there it is! The cover was done by the lovely Zahra Qaiser over at zahraq.com, so go and check out her stuff, she's fantastic^^ 

I've also decided that I'm just saying, what the hell, I'm publishing the paperback right now. Woo, right now! Let's go! Kindle will be available on October 13th, as was formerly decided for this book, but, yeah, paperback should be available in a few days. Kindle pre-order should be up soon as well.

Anyway, first chapter under the cut!

Chapter One

justine

 

Their new house was bigger than their old one. Two stories and an attic, a balcony coming off the left side of the house, and a porch big enough to have a barbeque on. Justine pulled an earbud out of one ear and leaned halfway out the window to get a better look, her seatbelt digging uncomfortably into her neck. The house was bigger, but the neighborhood looked more suburban, more Home Improvement than she thought she’d like.

            “Pretty, isn’t it?” her mother said, and Justine glanced at her and nodded, albeit a little reluctantly. Both of her parents were young, in their thirties, though her mother looked younger if her hair had been recently dyed and she had sunglasses on to hide the crow’s feet around her eyes, like now. Justine’s mother was short and generally happy, a teacher and sometimes author who was currently four months pregnant. “Prettier than Fargo.”

            “I guess,” Justine said.

            Danny, her younger brother and perpetual nuisance, paused his tapping on the seat in front of him and craned his neck to get a better view. “I want the balcony,” he said.

            “Justine gets the balcony,” her father, dark-skinned and tall, replied. “We talked about this.”

            “Yeah, but it looks super cool. And she’ll be gone in like three years anyway, so—”

            “Justine gets the balcony,” her father repeated. He turned up the classic rock on the radio and bobbed his head a few times to the guitar riff in Boston’s ‘More than a Feeling.’ “Don’t worry. I’m sure she’ll let you play on it.”

            “I won’t,” Justine said.

            Her mother snorted with laughter before turning and lowering her sunglasses to give Justine an admonishing look. Justine shrugged and put her earbud back in. She leaned back against the seat, pulling her knees up to rest on the back of the driver’s side seat and her feet dangling a few centimeters above her backpack. They’d only packed essentials in their small hybrid, and that meant mostly food. They had everything else packed into a trailer hooked to the pickup that they were renting, back in Fargo—after they got settled with what little they’d brought with them there, her father would go back in a U-Haul and pick up the rest of their things. They’d spent most of July packing, even having a garage sale to sell total non-essentials, and now they were here. Her parents had wanted a change; they’d wanted out of North Dakota and both had found good jobs in one of the very few states with less people than their former Upper Plains home.

            So they’d decided to move to this towering house in this sprawling-lawned neighborhood with nothing but a bag for each of them and a cooler full of food.

            Unfortunately, that meant that Danny didn’t have anything to entertain himself with and had been pounding out bad beats ever since he’d woken up an hour into the drive, which they’d begun at seven that morning. It was a quarter past seven at night now, the sun low in the sky but not set yet.

            Her father parked the car and Justine was out as fast as she could manage. She shouldered her backpack and went around to the trunk to grab the cooler and further cement her status as the favorite child, but she paused with her hands on the trunk.

            It was rural—more rural than Fargo, anyway—but the neighborhood was large enough to boast a pleasant-looking cul-de-sac. Each house had a decently sized yard, and the sidewalks between the were unmarked. They’d moved into a near-new neighborhood.

            “Nice, isn’t it?” her mother said. “Want help with that?”

            “No, I got it,” Justine said. She opened up the trunk and grabbed the cooler, shrugging her backpack more securely onto her back and headed for the house. Her gaze caught on a car idling just a bit down the street—a big black panel van. She smirked a little and nudged Danny with the cooler. “If that was a white van down there, you’d probably have to look out.”

            “Huh?” Danny said.

            “What are they teaching kids in elementary school these days? Stay away from the white vans, kid,” Justine said, and Danny rolled his eyes. He hit the cooler with both of his index fingers, and Justine jerked it away. “Do not start that again. Do not. I will drop this cooler on your head.”

            “Shut up,” Danny said, but he ran for the house instead of sticking around and bugging her. Justine followed, albeit a bit more slowly, and was about to yell about the screen door slamming shut on her when she saw a piece of paper stuck to the bottom. She crouched, balancing the cooler on one thigh, and pulled it free.

 

Hoffman man wife girl boy

Man black wife white kids mixed

TOA: August 16-25

con on retrieval

he’s not ready

 

            All except the last line was written in the same jumbled, scrawling script. Justine frowned. All of it looked like rough notes movers or sellers might make—although the mention of race confused her a little bit. Confused her, and kind of creeped her out, if she was being honest. She figured that Wyoming would be, if possible, even whiter than North Dakota—but even then, this was a weird thing.

            The cooler was getting heavy, though, so she shoved the note in her pocket, promising herself that she’d bring it up to her parents later, and headed inside.

            She dropped the cooler off in the kitchen and followed her brother’s voice up a spiral staircase, down an inappropriately grand hallway, and into a bedroom before finally stopping in front of a set of glass doors leading out to the balcony.

            “Justine, you have to let me have this room,” Danny said. “You have to.”

            “No,” Justine said. She tugged on one of the doors and, upon its refusal to open, felt along the side for a lock. “It’s mine.”

            Once she got the door open, she stepped outside and leaned against the railing, her gaze catching the panel van again. Had it moved?

            Danny burst out beside her, nearly sending her toppling over the edge. “But think how cool—”

            “It would be to sit out here and read, or do yoga, or homework, or—”

            “Drop things on Dad when he mows the lawn.”

            “Okay,” Justine said. “I’ll give you that one. Now scram. I want to put my stuff away.”

            Danny made a face at her, but he did leave, and she headed back to her room, sending one more glance toward the van. It was probably nothing to be concerned with. It was probably maintenance workers for something wrong in one of the other houses.

            So she shut the curtains and unrolled her sleeping bag in one corner (beds would come back with Dad), stacked a few unread books in the corner (she had more, bookshelves and the rest would come back with Dad), and folded up the extra change of clothes and her pajamas against one wall (dresser and the rest would come back with Dad). Finally, she placed an empty pill for her gluten intolerance (they’d forgotten to get her prescription refilled before coming out; Dad would do that when he went back to Fargo) atop her books. After she was done, she took a step back and surveyed her work.

            She couldn’t wait until the rest of her stuff got here. She wanted to put up posters, set up her (frankly, slightly outdated but still cool as hell) CD player, alphabetize bookshelves… as stressful as the move had been, the prospect of setting up her room was exciting.

            “Justine!” her mom called, and she trotted down to the staircase.

            “What?”

            “Come down and have something to eat! I’m cutting up the summer sausage!”

            “Coming!”

            Justine bounded down the stairs, running her hand along the smooth banister, and was just at the kitchen doorway when the doorbell rang.

            “I’ll get it,” Justine said, and her mother, trying desperately to cut slices of sausage as fast as her husband and son were eating them, smiled.

            “Thank you.”

            Justine opened the front door on two young women. They looked alike—sisters, she guessed, because they didn’t look far enough apart in age to be mother and daughter. One with long, dark, reddish-brown hair and the other with short hair streaked through with bleach. A blouse and slacks, a leather jacket and a tanktop. “Can I help you?” Justine asked.

            “Hi,” the one in the blouse said. “We’re your neighbors. We live just a few houses down. We noticed you guys coming in and figured we’d wrap up a plate of cookies and bring them over.”

            “Oh,” Justine said. The one in the leather jacket held out a plate—they looked like Lofthouse imitations: round sugar cookies with a generous helping of pastel-colored frosting on top. “Uh. Thank you?”

            “It’s our pleasure,” the one in the blouse said. She nodded to the plate that her sister was still holding. “Please, take it. We bake too many cookies. Every Saturday this psychopath whips up a fresh batch, and for her, a fresh batch means at least three dozen. We can’t eat them all.”

            “Sure,” Justine said. She took the plate. “Thanks. Um. I’ll try and get the plate back to you soon.”

            “No rush,” the one in the leather jacket said, speaking for the first time. She offered a shark-like smile. “Enjoy.”

            With that, the two of them turned and walked down the sidewalk. Justine watched them walk for a few moments, hoping to see where they lived so that she could return the plate more easily, but then her mother called her in and she shut the door.

            “What’s that?” her mother asked when she came back with a plate.

            “Cookies,” Justine said. “A couple of neighbors stopped by. Said that they saw us moving in and wanted to be the welcoming committee, I guess.”

            “How nice,” her mother said. “They look delicious. It’s too bad we didn’t get your prescription filled before coming out here.”

            “Yeah,” Justine said, shrugging. Both her brother and her father had peanut-butter-and-summer-sausage bagel sandwiches, though, and she looked at those with a bit more longing than the cookies. She wasn’t that big of a fan of sweets in the first place, but bagels and toast were something that she missed when she didn’t have her pills.

            Danny reached for the plate, but their mother slapped his hand away. “Finish your sandwich.”

            Danny stuck out his tongue, and their father grinned at him before reaching for the plate himself. Their mother danced away with it, shaking her head. “None of you until you finish your supper. I mean it, Zach,” she said, looking over her sunglasses. “Even you. We’ll have dessert as a family.”

            “Thanks,” Justine said.

            “Oh, honey—” her mother said, shaking her head. “You can scrape off some frosting or something. Or I think we still have some Twizzlers in the car. They’ll be warm!”

            “Okay,” Justine said, and finished off the rest of her supper. “I’m going to run and grab those Twizzlers. Don’t feel like you have to wait for me, because Danny looks like he’s going to have an aneurysm if he waits any longer.”

            Her mother laughed and peeled the plastic wrap off of the plate, setting them down in the center of the table. Justine paused and looked back at her family—Danny, his hair wild and curly and springing up everywhere as he leaned forward to pick the one with the most frosting, her father, with his tie crooked as always and his grin infectious, reaching for it before Danny could, and her mother, hands on her hips, demanding order with one raised eyebrow like she always could.

            It was the last time she saw her family like that.

 

±

 

It took her too long to find the Twizzlers. She’d checked the glove box first and found nothing but a bottle of Ibuprofen, the car’s registration, and a tire gauge. She’d checked the center console, which turned out a handful of napkins snatched from fast food restaurants and a handful of change. Under the passenger side seat, which just held Fifty Shades of Gray.

            She eventually found it crushed between Danny’s seat and his door, the packaging crusty with something she didn’t really want to identify. But there was still a good handful of licorice inside, so she ate a few as she made her way back to the house.

            Out of curiosity, she glanced back at the van. Still there.

            She decided to go and see what they were up to. She peeled another licorice off of the clump and bit down on it as she walked, biting the ends off first even though she didn’t have anything to suck through it.

            She knocked on the driver’s side window the van—it was curiously dark, so she couldn’t see who or what was inside, and the windshield had one of those tinfoil-looking sun blockers on the inside—and there was a thud. She took a step back, a little concerned, but after a few moments the window rolled down. On the other side was a disheveled teenage boy, probably a year or so older than her, with coppery hair and gray eyes.

            “What?” he asked. His accent was decidedly clipped, more Midwestern than Minnesotan—which Justine just supposed she was more used to, being from Fargo.

            “Just saw you idling here for a while,” Justine said. She took another bite of the candy. “What’s up? You okay?”

            “Yeah, I’m fine,” he snapped. He ran a hand through his hair and glanced back behind him. Justine thought of that old urban legend—the axe murderer in the backseat—and shivered a little. “I’m just—waiting for someone.”

            With that, he rolled up the window again and Justine sook her head, making her way back to the house.

 

±

 

She knew something was wrong when she opened the door and the only sound she heard was a soft plink… plink… plink… She paused in the doorway for a few moments, not really wanting to see it, not really wanting to see whatever had happened, but then her adrenaline kicked in, her heart sped up, and she felt the tingling at the tips of her fingers—and then she went quickly for the kitchen. Her hand tightened briefly around the bag of Twizzlers, and she stopped dead in the doorway.

            Her father sat tipped back in his chair, arms hanging at his side and his face toward the ceiling. His mouth was crusted with blood or vomit or both; his eyes were glassy and bulging. Her mother was on the floor, on her side, head lolled to the side, bloody vomit streaking the floor in front of her; her face; her blouse. Danny was right behind her, on his knees, his eyes squeezed shut and his hands making fists so tight his knuckles were white.

            “Danny?”

            He looked up at her and up came a glut of vomit, cascading over her mother’s body. Another retch brought more vomit, tinged red, and Justine grabbed her cell phone out of her pocket, fingers trembling so much she could hardly press the ‘Emergency Call’ button on the lock screen, and within a few moments she was connected to a 9-1-1 dispatcher.

            “9-1-1, where is your emergency?”

            “Yeah, yeah, my—my family’s dead, they’re dead, my brother, he’s puking up something, it’s bloody, my parents are dead—”

            “Where are you?”

            “Uh—uh we just moved here, I don’t—h-hold on, Danny—” she cut herself off as her brother threw up again. This time he fell forward, his forehead thudding into her mother’s arm. His body was still shaking, though, his shoulders moving up and down rapidly. Still alive. Seizing, maybe on his last legs, still alive.

            The address.

            She closed her eyes and knelt down beside her father. It was easier if she closed her eyes, easier if she prodded at thick denim pockets when she didn’t see the bloated and bloody and terrifyingly gray face. Checked one pocket. Nothing. Reached over and checked the other pocket.

            Wallet.

            Justine swallowed and pulled her father off of his chair. His body (his corpse) hit the linoleum floor with a sickening, terrible thud, and when she opened her eyes a fraction she saw him on his front, one arm twisted behind him, head twisted to the side with his tongue out, ass up in the air like he was doing some sort of yoga pose. But she could see the blocky shape of his wallet in one back pocket. She swallowed again, she could feel something trying to push its way up, either puke or tears, and pulled the wallet free. Opened it with shaking fingers—she found the slip of paper he’d written the address on and read it out to the dispatcher. She repeated it back, and Justine managed a, “Y-yeah, that’s right—”

            “Please take any surviving members outside—to a car, if you have one. Help will be there shortly. Would you like me to stay on the line with you?”

            Justine swallowed a few times. She could feel tears prick at the corners of her eyes but refused to let them pass. “N-no. No. No, I’ll be fine.”

            “All right,” the woman said, and Justine hung up. She stuck her phone back in her pocket and grabbed Danny under the arms, dragging him to the door, while he twitched and puked and his struggles grew softer. She tried not to think about that, though, as she gritted her teeth and shoved the door open with her shoulder. As his shoes bounced along the driveway and as she opened the backdoor of the Prius and leaned him against it, his ass on the ground and his head lolling back.

            She tipped it forward. So he would puke on himself instead of choking on it.

            She found that she couldn’t sit still, so she paced in front of him. He’d stopped throwing up. Hadn’t in a couple of minutes. He was still twitching, moaning a little bit, so she guessed (hoped) that if the ambulance got there soon enough, they could pump his stomach or something and he would survive it. And she wouldn’t lose her entire fucking family in one fell swoop.

            Out of the corner of her eye, she saw movement. A dark shadow, moving across their lawn and toward the black van that had been idling on the street this entire time.

            “Hey!” Justine called, and she broke into a sprint. The shadow glanced back, and she caught a bandanna over the face and silver hair.

            She put on some more speed, her legs pumping and her calves and thighs already screaming at her to stop, but she kept going. “Hey! What were you doing in there? Stop—”

            One side of the van slid back, and the silver-haired man dove in headfirst. The van was down the road before the door was shut, and Justine was left, panting, her hands on her knees and her eyes straining to read the license plate. She caught the last three numbers—173—but she doubted it meant much, anyway. They probably switched their license plates frequently.

            When she got back to Danny, he was dead. 


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